Sexual Predators Defined

• Profiles
• Characteristics Of Sex Offenders 
• Sexual Grooming
• Alert Signals

Knowledge is POWER.  Pedophiles don’t alert adults or children of their devious intentions.  Arm yourself with typical characteristics and traits. 

A generation of children has been incorrectly educated against strangers.  Those children are now parents repeating the same message.  It's easier to believe that the "dirty old man in the park", rather than clean-cut friend, family member, or relative is a pedophile.

Pedo means "child" in Greek. Phile is a derivative of Greek, Latin, and French, meaning "love."
The Exclusive type of pedophile is attracted to children only. The Non-Exclusive is attracted to both children and adults.

People who are pedophiles come from every walk of life.  They are men and women; young and old; rich and poor; educated and underachievers; nice and mean; all ethnicities; all communities; and all children are at risk unless they and their parents are informed.

Profiles
Child Molesters * Pedophiles * Predators * Incest * Sex Offenders: Defined
While the above terms are used interchangeably, the terms sex offender and child molester are more of a legal and social definition than a clinical one. The term incest is used when the offender has molested someone they are related to. Pedophile refers to a diagnostic category of child molesters and predator has more to do with the manner in which offenders gain access to children. However, these groups can overlap. For example some incest offenders also molest children outside of their family and some even become predatory. Not all child molesters are pedophiles and not all pedophiles molest children.  Offenders are also categorized by how dangerous they are and how likely they are to re-offend. Most of us have many misconceptions about these groups of offenders. The below information will help to clarify these issues.

Incest Offenders - Sexually abuse their own children but can also abuse other relatives and neighbors. They can be sexually attracted to children or offend because they are seeking intimate contact with another person regardless of relationship, age or vulnerability. Some don’t understand and others don’t care that they are hurting the child.

• Most have multiple victims both inside and outside of their immediate family.
• Some abuse both boys and girls in various age groups.
• Most appear normal and demonstrate no noticeable dysfunction.
• Few have criminal records.
• Most report that they were repeatedly able to talk family and friends out of reporting them and
  continued to offend.
• Many are likely to re-offend without treatment.

Pedophiles - Are adults who are sexually attracted to children and have a primary or strong interest in children. They offend children because they desire sexual contact with children.

• Most hold responsible jobs and frequently align themselves with reputable organizations, sports leagues and churches.
• They may work or volunteer with children.
• They are likely to be single or live with their parents or have a dysfunctional marriage.
• Some appear socially inhibited while others can be extremely charming.
• Many target pre-pubescent boys.
• Most do not have a criminal record.
• Most have molested many children before they are effectively reported to law enforcement.
  
• The majority is highly likely to re-offend.

Sexually Violent Offenders - Includes the group of offenders who kidnap, rape and even murder some children. This group constitutes the smallest, but most dangerous group of child molesters.

• They frequently assault their victims physically.
• In addition to abusing children, many have committed adult rapes, assaulted spouses, engaged in burglaries, been chronic drug users, are frequently unemployed and have led a dysfunctional lifestyle.
• Criminal record checks usually reveal a lengthy record of versatile criminality, incarcerations, probation violations and failed attempts at treatment.
• They have high re-offense rates for both sexual and generic criminal behavior.    Cory Jewell Jensen, M.S. and Steve Jensen, M.A.

Profile of a Pedophile
Pedophiles Can Be Anyone: Pedophiles can be anyone -- old or young, rich or poor, educated or uneducated, non-professional or professional, and of any race. However, pedophiles often demonstrate similar characteristics, but these are merely indicators and it should not be assumed that individuals with these characteristics are pedophiles. But knowledge of these characteristics coupled with questionable behavior can be used as an alert that someone may be a pedophile.

Characteristics of a Pedophile:

• Often the pedophile is male and over 30 years of age.
• Single or with few friends in his age group.
• If married, the relationship is more "companion" based with no sexual relations.
• He is often vague about time gaps in employment which may indicate a loss in employment for questionable reasons or possible past incarceration.

• He is often fascinated with children and child activities appearing to prefer those activities to adult oriented activities.
• He will often refer to children in pure or angelic terms using descriptives like innocent, heavenly, divine, pure, and other words that describe children but seem inappropriate and exaggerated.
• He has hobbies that are child-like such as collecting popular expensive toys, keeping reptiles or exotic pets, or building plane and car models.

Pedophiles Often Prefer Children Close to Puberty:

• Pedophiles often have a specific age of child they target. Some prefer younger children, some older.
• Often his environment or a special room will be decorated in child-like decor and will appeal to the age and sex of the child he is trying to entice.
• Many pedophiles often prefer children close to puberty who are sexually inexperienced, but curious about sex.

Almost all pedophiles have a collection of pornography, which they protect at all costs. Many of them also collect "souvenirs" from their victims. They rarely discard either their porn or collections for any reason.

One factor that works against the pedophile is that eventually the children will grow up and recall the events that occurred. Often pedophiles are not brought to justice until such time occurs and victims are angered by being victimized and want to protect other children from the same consequences.

Laws such as Megan's Law - a federal law passed in 1996 that authorizes local law enforcement agencies to notify the public about convicted sex offenders living, working or visiting their communities, have helped expose the pedophile and allows parents to better protect their children.

Characteristics:
Though there is no hard and fast profile of a pedophile, but these are some general characteristics

• Popular with both children and adults.
• Appears to be trustworthy and respectable. Has good standing in the community.
• Prefers the company of children.
• Feels more comfortable with children than adults. Is mainly attracted to prepubescent boys and girls. Can be heterosexual,homosexual, or bisexual.
• "Grooms" children with quality time, video games, parties, candy, toys, gifts, money.
• Singles out children who seem troubled and in need of attention or affection.  (Most youth will experience a time period of vulnerability in their lives.)
• Often dates or marries women with children that are the age of his preferred victims.
• Rarely forces or coerces a child into sexual contact, usually through trust and friendship. Physical contact is gradual, from touching, to picking up, to holding on lap, to kissing, etc.
• Derives gratification in a number of ways. For some, looking is enough. For others, taking pictures or watching children undress is enough. Still others require more contact.
• Strategically finds different ways and places to be alone with children.
• Are primarily (but not always) male, masculine, better-educated, more religious than average, in their thirties, and choose jobs allowing them greater access to children.
• Are usually family men, have no criminal record, and deny that they abuse children, even after caught, convicted, incarcerated, and court-ordered into a sex offender program. The marriage is often troubled by sexual dysfunction, and serves as a smokescreen for the pedophile's true preferences and practices.
• Are often, but not always, themselves victims of some form of childhood sexual abuse.
• Even if the pedophile has no children, his home is usually child-friendly, with toys, books, video games, computers, bikes, swing sets, skateboards, rec room, pool, snacks - things to attract children to his home and keep them coming back. Usually the items reflect the preferred age of his victims.
• A female pedophile usually abuses a child when partnered with an adult male pedophile, and is often herself a victim of chronic sexual abuse.
• A pedophile can act independently, or be involved in an organized ring, including the Internet, NAMBLA (North American Man/Boy Love Association), and other pro-pedophilia groups. Some pedophiles recognize that their behavior is criminal, immoral, and unacceptable by society, and operate in secrecy. Some are quite open and militant about their practices and advocate the normalization of pedophilia under the guise of freedom of speech and press, and uses innocuous language like "intergenerational intimacy."

A pedophile will not stop on his own, and will not turn himself in, because he does not take responsibility for his behavior and denies that he's doing anything harmful. He will abuse until he's caught.  A child does not always recognize when he or she is being abused, manipulated, or groomed by a pedophile. Unless the pedophile is a sexual sadist, he does not have to threaten a child into silence. The trust, gifts, secrecy, and "relationship" are enough. In some cases, the abuser will coerce the child into silence by saying that if anyone finds out, he would go to jail, or the child would, and maybe the child's parents. In other cases, threats to harm the child, pets, and family are used.

Pedophiles can be "treated" but never cured, because their sexual preference has always been, and always will be children. Their urges will always be present. Therefore, treatment focuses on changing, curbing, or re-directing the acting-out behaviors of pedophiles.

Knowing the profile of a pedophile, does this mean that the little league coach who has a great rapport with kids and treats them to pizza at his house is suspect? Or that the teacher who throws pool parties is? Of course not. The majority of people who like and work with children are not pedophiles. It does mean that we should be observant of all the adults in our children's lives, whether they wear a white collar, a blue collar, or a clerical collar.

If a child tells us he or she has been sexually abused by someone, be it family, friend, or trusted adult, we are obligated to believe the child first, and report it to authorities who will investigate further.

Sexual Grooming
Red Flag Behavior

Perhaps you have witnessed an adult playing with a youth that just didn’t seem quite right?  You are at the neighborhood block party where all the young kids twelve and younger are playing kick the can and notice a 22-year-old playing too. That one event may not constitute great concern, but what if the same 22-year-old begins wrestling with only girls or only boys?  Perhaps you have already been a witness to uncertain behaviors and dismissed them because you are not quite sure if you are making something out of nothing, or didn’t know what you were seeing was abusive?  We all have within us the most pure voice in the universe that guides us in our daily life.  It’s called our inner voice, our gut feeling, our intuition, our conscious.  When this voice speaks to us, it is usually never wrong and acting on behalf of a child who may be in danger is worth the risk of a possible mistake. 

The following are just a few examples of some red flag behavior that should be investigated, or watched very closely until more information is known.
Adults or older teen age youth who:

• Refuses to let a child set any of his or her own limits.
• Insists on hugging, touching, kissing, tickling, wrestling with or holding a child even when the child does not want this affection.
• Teenage boy babysitter who plays with your child, even when he is off duty.
• The man down the street who, in an unapproved program, tutors children for free.
• The coach who offers to drive your child to and from all practices, even though it is out of the way.
• Someone who enjoys being with your child, more than you do.
• Secretly gives your child gifts.
• A person who engages in activities that do not require others to be present.

The common tactics of sexual abuser’s action can happen in the presence of unsuspecting adults.

• Paying attention to a child who appears emotionally needy
• Talking about sexual issues, showing adult magazines or films, letting the child know s/he can come to them for sexual information or concerns
  
• "Accidentally" or purposefully exposing themselves (coming out of the bath, wearing shorts that allow a view of the genitals, openly praising nudity as "normal", etc.)
• Giving gifts, money, taking the child places, providing alcohol or drugs
• Telling the child that they need to examine his/her body for some reason
• Physical contact such as wrestling, tickling, pats on the butt, etc.
• Intrusive questions about the child's sexual development, fantasies, masturbation habits, or giving the child more information about sex than is appropriate for the child's age
• Bringing yourself down to the child's level of play (becoming the child's "buddy")
• Sharing inappropriate information about themselves or relationship problems, such as marital difficulties
• Not respecting the child's boundaries or privacy. This may be "rules" that bedroom or bathroom doors must be open, reading child's mail or diaries, going through their possessions, etc. It may also be verbal, such as intrusive questions about the child's activities or friends beyond what is appropriate for a parent to do. It may also be done by staring at the child or looking at his/her body in a way that makes him/her uncomfortable

Even though these are the common characteristics, not all offenders will demonstrate the above.
REMEMBER: If something seems too good to be true, it probably is.  Listen to the most pure in the universe; your GUT FEELING.  It will almost never be wrong.

Alert Signals For An Adult With Sexual Behavior Problems
Although it may be difficult to believe, many sex offenders wish that someone had stopped them from harming children by asking about their behavior.  People ask for help in their own individual way, and many times sex offenders are waiting for just that to happen. 

Do you know someone who:

• Often talks about the sexual activities of children or teens?
• Masturbates frequently or takes breaks from other activities to go masturbate?
• Talks about sexual fantasies with children and is not clear about what's okay with children?
• Was abused as a child and won't deal with it?
• Encourages silence and secrets in a child?
• Looks at child pornography?
• Often has a "special" child friend, maybe a different one from year to year?
• Spends most spare time on activities involving children or teens, not adults?

Characteristics of juvenile sex offenders:

• Juvenile sex offenders are typically between the ages of 13 and 17.
• They are generally male.
• 30-60% exhibit learning disabilities and academic dysfunction.
• Up to 80% have a diagnosable psychiatric disorder.
• Many have difficulties with impulse control and judgment.
• 20-50% have histories of physical abuse.
• 40-80% have histories of sexual abuse.

Offender’s Recommendations to Parents

• Watch for people, anyone, who is more interested in your child than you are.
• Over-loving people are potentially dangerous.
• Our offenses occur gently.
• Be careful of everyone, including relatives.
• I used to abuse kids in the same room with their parents and no one ever knew.
• Parents are too trustworthy.
• Parents should teach kids the “right” and “wrong” places where people might touch them.
• Kids need to know that if they are not comfortable with someone, they have the right to not be with them.
• Kids who are heavily punished at home are easy targets. “I give them love.”
• Single mothers families are easy targets: mom is overworked and grateful when I watch the kids.”   The Center for Sex Offender Management, 2000